KARA’s Hara Is Still Faster Than Your Bias Could Ever Dream Of Being

hara

A bunch of idols are competing in the 2015 Idol Star Olympics (the fact that there are Idol Star Olympics is reason #3243545456547657 why K-Pop is magical) but it remains unclear as to why they are even holding a 60 meter track qualifiers event at all.

Did anyone really expect anyone but Goo “Goosain Bolt” Hara to come in first? Jaekyung, Choa, Nana and Yura may be stiff competition when it comes to the human race’s general affection but there’s no one who can touch Hara on the track.

Look at this figurative beat down. It’s disgusting.

HAVE MERCY GOOSAIN BOLT

HAVE MERCY GOOSAIN BOLT

I mean, Gyuri was practically trying to shield her group-mates eyes from a slaughter.

Protect the young. Shield the weak. Goosain Bolt is here.

Protect the young. Shield the weak. Goosain Bolt is here.

Hara easily secured a first place with a time of 9.33 seconds of which approximately 0.72 seconds of it could actually have been called a race.

Wake me up when we get a rematch between Bora and Hara. That’s the only idol race that even has the appearance of real competition.

 

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11 comments

  1. i never understand why stylists don’t tie idols’ hair back for ISAC??

    1. Well, I think a lot of of it is that many of the ladies don’t take it that seriously. The ones that generally do, make sure they have their hair back in a ponytail or braided, so it isn’t in their way.

    2. The athletics come second to entertaining audiences.

      1. Unless you are a dangerously addicted gambler and placed wagers with someone making book on the Idol Olympics. You know somewhere in Korea there was a middle-aged man screaming at the TV when Choa at 100:1 odds failed to win the heat after he went double or nothing after losing the bet that A-Pink would upset Sistar in the 4×100 relay.

  2. I think Gaeun of Dal Shabet has something to say about that. Here’s her destroying Bora.

    1. Yeah, Kaeun won last year. It wasn’t even close. I don’t think Bora or Hara can hang with her.

      1. I honestly forgot about her. *hangs head

  3. Jisoo (Tahiti) and Kaeun (Dalshabet) ran faster times than Hara.

  4. Hopefully this will stop jealous bitches calling her unhealthy just cus shes skinny.

  5. The thing I notice is that Hara, Bora, and a few others either have taught themselves how to run properly or must have been in track at some point and were taught how to run. Hara gets so far out ahead because her form is efficient. So many of the other ladies are wasting a lot of energy with their running style. Also Hara keeps much lower coming out of the blocks giving her a boost getting off the line. The other girls almost all stood up first before starting to run. When you slow the video down to 1/4 speed, it really shows how much better Hara runs than even the second place finisher.

    Beating the 2nd place finisher by 1.2 seconds in a 60M sprint is like winning a marathon by half an hour. I wonder how much worse it would have been if it was an actual 100M sprint.

  6. Goo Hara – reality TV phenom

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