Taeyang’s teaser for upcoming solo album ‘Rise’ has all the abs and terrible hair that is to be expected

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Taeyang has a new solo album, ‘Rise’, coming out next month and like so many campaigns targeting the youth demographic, the teaser for the album is full of abs, dark-grittiness, comical hair and homages to werewolves.

Black and white really helps emphasize the grim-dark seriousness for a singer whose best works include singing about cooking kimchi fried rice and being the friend-zoniest friend-zoned friend to ever friend-zone. 

Of course, it’s hard to take this too seriously when Taeyang appears to be cribbing Twilight for his super-serious teaser. Full moon? Changing eyes? Conveniently shirtless for… reasons? A history of being the friend-zoniest friend-zoned friend to ever friend-zone? Somewhere, Taylor Lautner is experiencing deja vu and can’t fathom why.

And then there’s the hair. For reasons which probably require a pop psychologist to adequately explain, Taeyang went from essentially being one of the fore-bearers of the Asian Macklemore of hairstyles (his faux-hawk) to seemingly trying to make sure that no one would ever want to copy him ever again. In that, he’s succeeded beyond anyone’s wildest dreams, from his unfortunate braids which made him look like Jar Jar Binks:

Those ears, erhm, braids.

Those ears, erhm, braids.

To this current teaser’s hairstyle, which seems to draw inspiration from both 90’s Nick Carter and Wall Street’s Michael Douglas.

Long live the mushroom cut (not really).

Long live the mushroom cut (not really).

Douglas at his Douglas-iest.

Douglas at his Douglas-iest.

‘Rise’ and all of Taeyang’s abs and horrible hair will make its comeback on June 2nd (digitally) and June 10th (physically). Will Taeyang convince the masses to take up his Gekko-shroom hairstyle? Only time will tell.*

*He won’t.

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2 comments

  1. tsubaduba · · Reply

    “…he’s succeeded beyond anyone’s wildest dreams, from his unfortunate braids which made him look like Jar Jar Binks”
    I’M CACKLING so badly 😀

    1. Reality is always funnier than fiction.

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