Review: Nine Muses – “Glue” Tries to Blind With Sex and Damn Near Succeeds

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Like an obsessive compulsive mechanic or any episode of Breaking Bad, Nine Muses have their formula for success refined to a finely oiled machine and “Glue” continues the group’s fantastic year in delivering slick, assured, sex-filled music videos.

There are no surprises with “Glue”. If you’ve watched “Wild” or “Gun“, “Glue” is pretty much that whole package in a different filter with a slightly different dance beat to it. And you know what? That’s perfectly fine. Nine Muses has never pretended to be anything it wasn’t. The Nine are simply impossibly beautiful singing supermodels who will dance around in sexy outfits and demand your eyeballs in order to hook your ears (it’s usually supposed to work the other way, but Nine Muses is so God Damn Impossible that they defy stuff like “artistic merit”). It’s simple music, and an almost insultingly simple concept, but if simplicity is this fine, then complexity is the work of the devil and it deserves to die. “Glue” would suffer from diminishing returns if it were made by a normal group of mortals, but Nine Muses seem to have an infinite supply of hnnnnnnggggg that makes the concept of “diminishing returns” completely alien.

“Glue” is a pretty standard electro dance pop beat, one which seems ubiquitous; modern yet somehow a bit dated as well. The slight guitar licks recall a bit of a disco flair and the beat would have a nice home at any young, hip department store. The snares keep everything moving at a brisk pace, and the song never feels overwrought or flimsy as a result. Without a frenetic tempo however, “Glue” more or less glides from its start to its conclusion. The composition of the lyrics is a bit like “Wild”. There’s two rap breaks, presumably so Eunji and Euaerin don’t have to Highlander each other, but it makes it a bit hard to separate chorus from verse. “Glue” is a song which, by itself, would pleasantly pass by and then be easily forgotten, especially when compared to how Nine Muses began the year with “Dolls” and “Wild”. Luckily for Nine Muses, there’s not just a song.

Brace yourselves, for the gifs are coming.

Brace yourselves, for the gifs are coming.

There is also a video and good god, shut down all music videos forever.

The entire thing is made up of glamour shots of Nine Muses alternatively looking hot in dresses, looking hot in red pleather pants and looking hot in black pleather pants. There is no creativity, the entire thing is a phoned in dance-in-a-box concept with solo shots designed to highlight and flatter each member’s figure. The white backing and prominent use of black and red might as well have been ripped from the “Wild” playbook with only the slight blue hue being a concession to bring anything new to the table.

And it’s perfect.

I could wax poetic on the glory of the visuals of Nine Muses but these should do a better justice to the eternal holiness of Nine Muses in “Glue” than any language ever could.

Take my everything Eunji.

Take my everything Eunji.

No, wait. Sungah have my all.

No, wait. Sungah have my all.

Fuq, I'm running out of me at this point.

Fuq, I’m running out of me at this point.

SGHLSJGJ:BVJKBVJKFGJKFHGRHG GIVE SERA ALL THE EVERYTHING

SGHLSJGJ:BVJKBVJKFGJKFHGRHG GIVE SERA ALL THE EVERYTHING

“Glue” is not a song which could survive on it’s own. The beat isn’t very creative and the vocal performances are passable but not memorable. The hook is nowhere near as great as some of Nine Muses’ previous efforts and yet one can’t help but feel that it was all done on purpose. In many ways, the song works best as background music to the real showcase of the music video: Nine Muses being all Nine Muses. Once one views “Glue” as a pleasant soundtrack to Heaven’s Own Photoshoot, the music video makes a lot more sense and the piece taken as a whole becomes much more enjoyable. “Glue” is not Nine Muses strongest single of the year but it is a solid reminder that when it comes to sexy, no one has it down to a science like Nine Muses.

THE KEYS TO THE KINGDOM. GIVE THEM TO HER.

THE KEYS TO THE KINGDOM. GIVE THEM TO HER.

Rating: Wait, there’s music to this? All I could hear was my blood oozing out all my orifices.

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14 comments

  1. Fleur De Seoul · · Reply

    And there’s my lady boner…

    I’m still waiting for the song and the video to top “Wild” though. It may never happen and that makes me sad.

    1. It would for me too, but “Wild” is so good that it would be a small miracle if they did top it.

  2. looks like Sungah is making to the top of your bias list XD

    anyway, pretty much agree with you here. While this song is not their best release of the year, this is their best looks and arguably their best ‘hnggggggggg’ music video of the year.

    1. They really tried to outdo themselves with this. If everything was on mute, then this one would be the best. But listening to “Wild” is like experiencing an orgy of sound so I still give that one the nod on a whole.

  3. This whole time I was wondering if you were going to just plaster the entire review with nothing but gifs of Sera’s boobs. Glad to see you had some self-control, Slug.

    Personally, I enjoyed the song so much and is up there on one of their best releases yet (second only to Wild, however). I’ve had the video on replay many times now and the song has been my jam since its release. I’m going to excuse 9muses for their lack of creativity on the mv because having 4 different comebacks in one year can be harsh on groups. And personally, the whole rotating camera shots and flaring backgrounds are already pretty creative enough for me, so go figure.

    1. Yeah, I didn’t mention the editing and direction in this one but I do love the rotating camera shots in this (and the slight fast-forwards and slow-downs). The lens flare is a little Abrams-y for me though.

      And I almost dedicated an entire post to Sera’s boobs in this video before deciding that it could, perhaps, be construed as overkill.

  4. rohaniyerdxb · · Reply

    I spent the last couple of days mulling over what I think of the track. It’s pretty close to most of what has been said already.

    1) For the sake of public safety, it’s better if “Wild” remains un-bettered. Flip side is that they might have set a standard that they might not be able to reach for some time now.
    2) Assuming that they are human, I guess that it will be a while till they come back again. That makes me sad.
    3) As has been said across the interwebs, we got to hear a bit more of the other members this time & the reduced harmonization/ technical trickery compared to Wild means that we can hear something closer to their true singing voices (I’m looking at Minha here).
    4) While a dance in the box concept, I found the execution to be comparatively unique with the rotating shots (and the variation at the end with different members in the foreground & background).
    5) Sungah is starting to make her presence felt quite a bit these days. That’s a good thing.
    6) The song itself – I was a bit underwhelmed initially because I didn’t notice the chorus until it was already completed. But after listening to it a few times, I felt that expecting Wild again is quite a bit unfair & the general disco feel is rather decent (with some parts similar to Daft Punk even).

    Even after watching Wild & Gun more times than I can count, I always have something to take away after. I suppose that given enough time, this will also be an enjoyable if forgettable song. But the video – 9M videos are not made to be forgotten.

    1. Ironically, the fact that they decided to use less technical trickery makes me like this one a little less. Each individual member does come through more, but it sounds more hollow as a result. Best thing about having nine people is that it’s plausible to double track your best vocalists and have it come through like a rich chorus of angels every time.

      Sungah is slowly rising up the Nine Muses bias list.

      I have a feeling that this one will grow on me, but I don’t see it rising above “Wild” or “Dolls”, both of which I still listen to frequently.

    2. I agree so much on point number 2. It’s sad knowing that this will probably be their last promotions in a long time so I’ll probably make the most of it (upping YT views, voting on shows, doing whatever the hell would get them more attention, hey I have a lot of free time). It’s a shame too since I just got into Namyu since their Wild promotions, which was like during May I think? This was such a good year for old and new 9M fans alike.

    3. Hope they get a good enough rest next year. Although it kinda sucks for us fans, but 4 comebacks in a year is really the best a k-pop fan could ask for. Not to mention the other tracks and a full album totalling to ~20 songs, most of which are good and are keepers in my playlist. This has been a Nine Muses year. I’m glad that they are starting to become more popular and getting many new fans 🙂

  5. THERE ARE SO MANY SERA BOOB SHOTS it made my life.

  6. Somewhat off topic, but have you seen this?
    http://popdust.com/2013/12/15/former-nine-muses-member-says-she-quit-k-pop-group-because-she-cant-sing/
    I think Kim Rana was the prettiest of the nine muses back then.and I missed her during the Figaro promotions even though I did not her name back then.

  7. Correction “… did not know her name back then.”

    1. Yeah, she really is. When I first got into Nine Muses I was stupidly disappointed that she wasn’t in the group anymore.

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